Strap On Your Angel Wings: Destiel in Purgatory
by SibylVanestiel
Summary: Hell-atius fic. Purgatory with Dean and Cas, how they grow to love again. Slash.


The sun never rose in purgatory, but Dean should not have been surprised. Most of these things craved darkness, and if they were to have any sort of afterlife he understood why it would be this. The full moon was the only light and it never dulled, or changed or clouded over. And no matter which direction he chose, which path he took, he would always lead them back to where they started.

An endless circle of darkness, and wilderness.

He could hear them, moving in the trees, in the eternal night; hunting him. Cas had scouted what he could, but his angel mojo didn't have enough juice to get them very far. These things were already dead. How do you kill something that is dead? How do you run from them in their own territory? How long would he and Castiel survive when they all discovered who walked among them?

His only chance was to stall as long as possible, giving Sammy enough time to get them out. Only problem was, he had no idea how long he had been there, or how time worked in this savage place. For a divine being Cas didn't have a whole lot of answers either.

"I don't know, Dean." Was his standard grouchy reply now.

Every now and then he might throw out a tidbit from a story he heard once, or a rumour that had come his way from among the garrison, but all in all, he had very little knowledge of purgatory.

"Great! Any bright ideas?" Dean raised his eyebrows, but not his voice; careful not to draw too much attention.

"Hide."

"Hide? Where?" His frustration was growing.

"I am not going to be very good in a fight right now, so this is the only choice we have."

The angel stalked off to the nearest path, looking for any place to offer shelter. Dean felt he had no choice but to follow.

They had passed by a cave on one of the paths, but ruled it out- in case it was some sort of nest they didn't dare disturb. Castiel found it again in just a few short steps. Examining it from every angle before stepping into the mouth and smelling the air.

"Cas!" Dean whispered harshly, "What the hell?"

But the angel ignored him and quickened his pace, moving closer to the walls and guiding his fingers along them, feeling the stones, getting a measure of the space.

Flicking his lighter, Dean held the flame at arm's length, trying to follow Cas's lead, itching with tension that this slightly off his rocker angel was about to stumble onto something terribly wrong.

"I've got a bad feeling about this," He muttered.

But there, only a few feet away, was a pool of fresh water at Cas's feet. There was nothing else. A dead end. Which meant he was now trapped in this cave, with all manner of things anxious to corner him and make him into a meal. He opened his mouth to tell Cas that they needed to get the hell out, when the angel's hand shot up suddenly to stop him.

"This will serve, we will shelter here,"

Dean croaked out a noise of objection, ready to list all the reasons why they should get out as soon as possible when Cas stopped him a second time.

"It is the mark of Eve," he said, running his hands over the symbols carved into the wall. "This was a sacred space for her, it held some power for her, and they-" he motioned to the entrance of the cave "will still respect it. It may even hide us, for a time."

The heat of the flame on his hand became too much, and the shock of everything Cas had just said and the exhaustion all added up. He couldn't be brave or logical right now; dropping the lighter and throwing himself to the ground he drunk deeply from the pool and splashed the water on his face.

The angel picked up the little light and held it high, taking in the rest of their newly found shelter. They had walked quite a ways from the mouth- at least fifteen feet, and the curvature of the rocks hid their flame well. Seeing no reason to put it out, the angel set it down, still glowing softly on to the rocky floor and sat down before it.

When the hunter had drunk his fill he leaned back against the cave wall and pulled his coat tightly around him.

"I don't need sleep. I can watch." The gravely voice said, as Dean's eyes closed and the light went out.

There was nothing but darkness when he woke; for a moment he forgot where he was. But there was a scent in the air that comforted him and as he reached up to wipe the drool from his mouth and the sleep from his eyes he felt the weight of the fabric on him. The flame sprung to life in front of him and he looked down to see Cas's coat draped over him.

"Uh, thanks." He managed to say after a moment.

"I didn't need it, and you looked as though you did." Castiel replied, matter of factly.

"Look Cas, I'm sorry I've been harsh with you. I know we are both stuck here, so I didn't mean to make it seem like- you know... like it was your fault or something. You really came through this."

"Thank you, Dean. I knew there was forgiveness in there. Somewhere."

"Something like that."

They had no signs of pursuit and Dean lost all track of how much time could have passed. He knew it had to have been days, at least, but his 5 o'clock shadow had barely begun to creep across his face. Was it possible time just moved slower here? Making it even more hellish than he previously thought. Castiel had been a good caretaker at least, bringing him what food he could find from foraging. It was rabbit food and there was little of it to go around, but he was grateful- even if he didn't actually say so. Dean would drink from the pool and when Cas went out to scout he would bathe a little in the small spring that flowed through it as well. They sat in darkness most of the time, trying to conserve the fuel that remained in the lighter for emergencies only. But the angel occasionally brought twigs to light a very small fire that provided little light and even less heat.

They didn't leave the cave. Dean was tense from all the waiting- he had gone a long time now without killing something and it was wearing on him.

More time passed, just as slow as it always had, but nothing changed. They spoke little more than a few words at a time, Cas brought food, Dean slept, nothing more.

Until the day the angel returned from a quick scouting to settle next to the hunter, instead of opposite him, as he had done every time before. The embers of the dying fire played across his face as he turned his blue gaze on Dean.

"I need you to let me touch it, Dean. I am weakening and soon my body will begin to need food and sleep as well. I need you to let me touch your soul."

Seeing Dean's understanding of the situation and the reluctance on his face pained the angel, but after a few moments the hunter blinked and nodded slightly.

Laying down on the rocky terrain Dean folded the belt between his teeth, knowing that any scream might alert all of purgatory to his whereabouts. Biting down hard he felt the strangest sensation. It was not one of pain- not the torture he was waiting to come over him, not the agony he had seen others suffer during this same ordeal. It was a warmth, a slow, smooth burn that spread to every molecule in his being. It was a tingle, it was relief- like when you finally manage to scratch that itch you were so desperate to reach. He didn't want it to end.

The glow of it was over too quickly and he found that he has actually relaxed so much the belt had slid out of his teeth completely and lay beside his head. He shivered, bringing himself back from wherever he had been.

"Are you well?" The voice asked in the now total darkness of the cave.

"Yeah, you?"

"I am healed. Thank you."

"What was that? I mean, you did that to that kid and he was in pretty bad shape."

The twig caught and suddenly the pale amber light made it possible to see Cas again. Only, this time he looked as though he were reflecting the flames himself, glowing with a radiance Dean hadn't seen in him before.

"It is your soul, Dean. You would not feel pain, because your soul carries a piece of me in it- and those two pieces want nothing more than to be joined."

"Explain! Now." He demanded; his suspicions were getting the better of him, and he didn't want to go down that road again.

"When I raised you from perdition, I had to first remake your body and bind your soul back to it. This is a powerful thing- it requires a powerful magic, if you will. You were Michael's vessel so I was to remake you using the grace of God. Only, he was no where to be found, so it was decided by my superiors I was to bring you forth using my own grace. I have so little in comparison to Michael that he did not care if you were marked for me- he could easily overpower such a thing. But, when you refused him, he did not mend you to suit his needs and so you remain mine."

"Wait, wait; so if my soul has a part of you in it, why couldn't I hear you when you tried to speak to me? Why wasn't I your vessel or whatever?" He tried to maintain the pitch of his voice now as realization flitted in.

"You were not meant to be my vessel, Dean. You could never have been- even with all my grace. You could not hear me- because you simply didn't want to. Jimmy was a man of faith and he was open to the idea of angels and of God, but you were not."

Dean sighed, pulling his knees in closer, and sinking his head in his hands. He nodded silently for a time, before focusing again.

"So you were saving me even back then."

Dean felt a flush creep up his face and realized he was having a dreaded chick flick moment, luckily the subtle nuisances of humanity were not always obvious to Cas and the moment passed without any additional weirdness.

"I'm going to get some sleep, that kinda, took it out of me."

The angel nodded and put out the small flame, but he didn't move away so the warmth of his shoulder was right against Dean's.

When he woke, he was comforted by the idea that he at least knew where he was this time. And the smell of Castiel was present, and there was something cushioning his head and warming his body.

The lighter came to life and the small flame danced beside him. His head was cradled in the angel's lap, a protective arm thrown over his back and the trench coat keeping his body heat in. He slammed his eyes shut again, moaned slightly and shifted a little, playing as though he is not really awake yet. Mostly because he can't face the situation he has found himself in, but also because he can't bring himself to end it. The light died again and he does fall back into the deepest sleep since being locked in this prison.

By the time his beard had started to come in he accepted the fact that he enjoys sleeping cuddled into the angel, and they have a silent understanding that when Dean sleeps, they are always in very close proximity. Dean slept well and Cas never complained about the scratchy facial hair that would rub against his skin in the total darkness of the cave.

They don't talk about how things were before Cas's deal with Crowley; before he lied to Dean. The don't talk about how before, leviathans and souls, and all the war of heaven taking it's toll on the angel, they would have been more than happy to share these moments of closeness. Castiel knew he would be forgiven one day, but what he doesn't know is if he can get back all he sacrificed in his pursuit to protect Dean. He didn't want to wage a war, to see his brothers disappear forever, to see the Winchesters in danger again, but he had done it with the best reasoning. He would never forgive himself; he would never be the same, and maybe that was why Dean couldn't get past it either.

He longed for that again. When Dean would take him so completely and he would give himself over to the joy of it. He would one day earn back the love he had lost, even if it took longer than Dean had to give. They were tied, and that meant he would follow Dean into heaven one day, even if it could only be to watch him. He could live a thousand human lifetimes and yet the memory of Dean's hands on his flesh would never fade. For it truly was his flesh now- no trace of Jimmy Novak remained and he had grown used to moving in his skin. It wasn't a piece of clothing anymore, it was his body and it responded to his thoughts.

Carnal hunger was not something he had felt before, even in his few hours at the establishment Dean had taken him to with the intention of introducing him to just that. He had been too out of place, too unprepared. But the time they had spent with each other from then on, exploring one another's bodies was like an awakening for him. Now he couldn't control his body, and when he thought back to those days he would stiffen and remove himself from the cave until he had himself contained.

His usual scouting trips yielded very little information anymore, but there was a growing restlessness amongst the residents of their cage. They were all becoming aware, but instead of fighting amongst themselves as they had been doing for however long the angel and the hunter were present, they were working together. They flocked to the banner keen on destroying a Winchester and an angel. It would take them time to organize, because there were still many sceptical of one another, but soon they would get over their nature as enemies, and competition for dominance.

Returning to the cave, flustered by this latest bit of news he removed his coat and handed it to Dean, knowing he would be keeping watch while the man slept. But to his surprise Dean didn't put out the light and cuddle up under the coat, his back pressed against the angel sitting next to him. Blue eyes met green and then soft lips hidden behind a scruffy beard were touching his.

"I've missed you, Dean." He whispered as the gentle kiss came to an end.

"Shhh."

The calloused hands of the hunter made quick work of his shirt and explored his chest. They didn't need words to communicate, Dean would take what he wanted and Cas would get what he was given. It had always been this way and Castiel was relieved to fall back into what they had once shared.

Taking the hunter in his mouth after releasing him from his jeans, he moaned. Dean's breathing increased rapidly as he sucked and teased. The fist that gripped his hair tightly yanked and pushed as Dean's hips rocked, until he was pulled free from his task, whining at the loss.

The man pushed him back, tugging the waistband of the angel's pants so they fell to his knees. Bending the angel onto his hands and knees, Dean slicked his hand with spit and forced himself in to the puckered skin that would give him a quick release after the agonizingly slow build. Cas reared back with the power of it, as Dean reached out and grabbed the angel's hair again.

Slamming together, a chorus of grunts and moans echoing through the cave, the hunter claimed his angel in the dying light of the burning twigs. As though asking for permission, Cas turned his head to look over his shoulder and beg for release. Dean's nod meant he himself as close. Shifting his weight between his knees and one remaining hand he found himself so hard he nearly not need touch himself at all.

Imagining Dean's cock in his mouth, while it was pounding into him, as he stroked in time with the hunter's movements he held tight. When Dean's shudder came that signalled release, and the smack on his ass that let him know he was permitted to let go as well, he pushed one final time, sliding the hunter in as far as possible. That set him off erupting at last.

"I missed you too, Cas." Dean said, as he slid out and kissed the naked flesh on the angel's back.

"We need to leave here, Dean. They will find us soon, and not even their fear of the Mother will frighten them away."

"Ok, Cas."

They gathered their few possessions and the remaining food they had managed to collect, and taking each other's hands they walked out of the mouth of the cave. The moon full as always, but today there is a bloody red ring around it.

Squeezing Cas's hand tighter, knowing whatever comes they will fight it together; they are suddenly lifted from the ground, feet leaving the false earth below them.

"Is this you, Cas?"

"No!"

There is a panic in the angel's voice Dean has never heard before. They hold tight to one another as they rise above the moon and the trees fall away. There is a wall of fire above them, but they don't stop. The angel forces Dean's face from his upward gaze and pulls his sight to his own as they near the flames above. Locking his lips and folding his wings around his hunter he feels the blistering heat overtake him, and the only thing preventing him from crying out is Dean's mouth on his.

They stop their ascent and float in the cool air around them, seeing nothing but a cavern below, no fire. Slowly the ground rises to meet them and their feet take purchase on seemingly solid ground again.

"Uh, Guys" Sam's voice brings them out of themselves and at last they begin to breathe as separate beings again.

Rushing into the arms of the younger Winchester they hold tightly to their saviour as Sam's arms circle around them both.

"Let's go home."


End file.
